I am so so stupid i mean how on earth do i want to get a really good friend if i cannot simply meet someone ata particular area and now i am planning how to go tomorrow to see him. may be i should tell him i simply am not ready to meet him right now, chances are he will get mad and totally bust it. sometimes i think i am a crazy workaholic with no time for loved ones and friends or that i am just punishing myself for not being perfect. i had never known a perfectionist like me.
I am never meet one. i am sure i am just terribly scared of actually falling for someone which is why i want to keep my distance because i am afraid i may make a mess of it. i could actually fall for this guy, only he is 5yrs younger but looks 35. I am going to ask him when i meet him, if i do why he is such a control freak. i am upset, there is this guy in my office that just loves talking about sex and it is so offensive bcos i know he says it and watches for our reactions.
It's crazy and i am beginning to be repelled by him cos if i say it like it is, i am kind of a prude. He was talking about quiet guys and saying that there are like tigers in the bedroom. i think he gets a kick from scaring conservative guys like myself or fascinating us whichever is the case. I am not sure if my blog is safe for everybody's reading because i am writing stuff thats really personal. well, whatever!