H e hates my guts...

He (i had no romantic entanglements with him whatsoever, he's really older than me) resents me but will never admit it. he feels like i don't deserve God's goodness. all this just helps me appreciate what God did when he sent Christ.

Can you remember a time when you did not ask for goodies and your mom/dad bought them, that feels like undeserved love se. well that's how salvation feels, you know what God's love takes so much better.
so no matter how many judges, scoffers and mockers mask themselves as believers (what exactly do they believe?) and mask their true feelings, i will wear my righteousness with pride and stand up to be counted as a light in Zion.

When i focus on them and their crazy notions and hypocritical judgmental attitude, i just want to give in and throw in the towel and run away but when have i ever taken the easy way out?

I am turning around and fighting them back (i am tired of being bullied) not the way they are used to fighting; by ganging up and creating division, pretending kindness and praying evil in the same breathe. acting nice and the next moment sending nasty comments, gossiping endlessly and preaching about how only you will... forget about it!

i on the other hand choose to do the word and trust my instincts (the holy ghost's voice for believers) that everything he says is true, i am going to feed them patience, kindness and understanding as much as it hurts.
(It feels like the first time i will be living by faith; the 5 months without opposition made me soft; i let down my guard and now everyone is holding bazookas and waiting, no praying for me to fail cos more is at stake).

since he is doing all the stuffs intentionally, this is my solution: no one can successfully put me down or tear me down because i know who i am and the greater One lives in me; the Holy ghost, he is my counselor, standby, and teacher so i am surrounded with favor and therefore i can't go wrong!

Peace.