Me....

What keeps me going...

This time, i direct you to a man of God who's celebrating the nativity through play and it is blessing me. Sometimes it is terribly lonely trying to follow the path God has set for you amidst many dissenting voices who believe they know what best you should do by experience. He's @drtonyrapu go check him out, he's really cool and spirit submitted.

Sometimes God does something so big you were expecting, but weren't really expecting and the people who you believe should encourage you are the ones who dissuade you. Sometimes it is so big that because you don't know the complete story you could make a mistake and follow the voice of experience. What stops me is the fact that the people speaking don't know the beginning of the story, the covenant is not with them but with God.

Like I sang along with Tye Tribbett yesterday and felt the stirrings of faith for the first time in a long time, "I have no other choice than to trust You..." the title of the song is 'No other choice' by Tye Tribbett. Sometimes all you can do is trust that God can take of you and your family better than you can and put your hands in His and walk with Him.

My heart broke when I said, "...but I know that every word You say is true..." because I can say the words but I know that my actions are contrary so I chose to make a U-turn and actually trust God when I say those words because He started the chain reaction and He can finish it.

Holy Ghost...

Spiritual things...
It aint planned
You just know what to hum when the time comes
It can be a laugh
A hum
Or a prayer
As long as God is the focus

Peace beyond my understanding!

"Those you don't pray don't see into the realm of the spirit, they only see what others see".

Am I praying? No I am done with the praying. I am in thanksgiving mode. Am I supplicating? Not really I am affirming the word of the Lord.
It has been a long time since I acknowledged that there was a realm of the spirit.
Has my mindset changed? I guess! I am renewing my mind, sha! I am tired of the microwave Christianity. How do you see into the realm of the spirit if you don't pray? Is it magic?

A thousand times, no.
The things I had forgotten on the road to pleasing man. I have been like humpty-dumpty for the last three years and still no one was pleased least of all, me. God may have been pleased some of the time. I am just so glad that He never left me. Who said ministry was easy?

I am worried and scared about the road I am on. I don't know if I can do it because no one has changed. I hate nothing more than human conflict and there is going to be a lot of it. Hardly anyone has the fruits of the spirit and unlike the gifts of the Holy Spirit, you need to obey the Holy Spirit to get the fruits of the spirit. His gifts are without repentance. His gifts are developed when you obey. Obedience is not easy but the rewards of obedience cannot be bought with money.

It is well with my soul.

Just obeying the saying, say to the righteous, It is well. 

Mine adversaries are many and they do not even pretend to oppose me, they are 'oha' about it. They have searched and searched for ways to disqualify me, at a point I stopped caring. It was after the weary time. The weary time was so horrible because I wasn't physically tired, I was weary in my soul and emotionally. I was emotionally drained and I had nothing to give; I didn't even know at which point the peace filled my soul. I just know that God sent me the midwives.

Thank you, Jesus. I couldn't have made it if you didn't send the midwives. I see the journey ahead and Lord, I just trust you to lead me in the right path.
I function in God's wisdom and the ability to fulfil all that You ask is in me in Jesus name, amen.

It feels good to be sincere!
 

Not so random...

You know
I should learn to pray seriously when the Holy Ghost tells me something

This morning He said, your power cord is not in your bag
I checked and it wasn't, i then ran upstairs to get it

You might think there is no gain but if i hadn't worked in the spirit
yesterday, i would have regretted it.
I am down with walking in the spirit so much more.

All he did was ask me to rebuke depression and suicidal thoughts
I did albeit a little adamantly
It is embarrassing to pray such prayers but i did anyway.

I thank God that God answered my 'not good enough prayers'

Only God knows what made me get satisfied with living as if the spirit realms
doesn't exist.

You see, my dad is a witch/wizard, whatever, point is that he serves the
devil actively, he fasts, gives money and all that, for the devil who doesn't love him

Whatever, i am going to be so much more conscious of the realm of the spirit
not so i fear demons but so i am convinced that angel michael, angel gabriel
and all those other wonderful angels of God are waiting to do my bidding
when i pray the word.

When i rebuke any spirit, the angels go to work and make the demons powerless
I thank you Father because I am going through.

I will get to the total manifestation of my miracle because this is what God wants for me
and my family

Jehovah- Omni Potent God is my God
All powerful

I don't even need to grow my faith because it is the faith of Jesus
All i need to do is starve my doubts and all the sources of doubt
common sense abi
That is why i walk by faith and not by sight

And i drink from the rivers of God's pleasure!

Peace!

random: annoying thingz

I cannot cope with lying, gossiping and intending to manipulate me or intimidate me with gossiping, I just don’t respect that. I can respect the fact that some people are such criminals that unless they use the world system in winning a battle they think is worth it, they are not satisfied! At least, I am getting used to it.

I feel like I am gossiping!

Thoughts!

I talked with someone today and as much as my strong self-will has been a blessing, it is going to be a problem because guys see it as a challenge, something to destroy before they get the Golden Fleece. I have still not seen a perfect match and I am going to get something of a reputation or I am going to have to learn to communicate my non acquiescence to the intentions of some guys towards me. I am sure someone is putting the word out; they are choking me with their intentions because it seems like a race and I don’t do anything like a race. By the way, they are a far cry from my imagination.

I want something real, and most especially something I won’t regret. Patience is a very important factor because my mom tried time and again to break my self-will and thank God, she did not succeed else I would not have survived the rape in 2000. It’s a testimony of the goodness of God that I don’t cry when I hear the word rape any longer. Even when young ladies use it against me, I don’t feel it any longer.

I just can’t seem to have those inane conversations that are going nowhere. I break the pact to walk in love today and I am back on track right this moment. When am I going to get it right? Did the apostle John get it perfectly right ever, it was rumoured in 1^st Century Christianity that John was the apostle who won more souls by his display of love and the divinity of God and I do so want to be like that; though I don’t resemble the picture of where God wants to take me to because my flesh is used to having its way and does not like being disciplined.

God loves me so much, I want to love Him that much and give my life for Him if necessary, I want Him to guide my steps, I want to see the light in every situation so that I know what to do every time so that I am led by the spirit of God always.

I don’t feel anything for those twats anymore. It’s just annoying that they are still talking about me; I wish they would leave me alone and hold on to God. Hold God, leave me, I am a daughter of God, all your schemes and scams against me are not going to succeed, God is protecting me even when I am not aware!

Honorable men...

I love men
Contrary to popular beliefs
I love responsible men (qualified)
I love men of vision and power
men who can see where they are going to.

I love men who can respect women
all the time
I love men who can take responsibility
Who have a home and prepare for marriage

I am preparing for marriage
I haven't picked a man yet, Too busy naming
but i am preparing
So a man who wants to find a woman before
he prepares is a joker

I love men
Courageous men

Unfaithful me, flirty men, rude men are a turn off
Disrespectful men, gossipy men they are a turn off
men who cheat in their business or other dealing are
a turn off
men who lie are a turn off

A minister @hartramsey said all men lie
He nearly caused me to backslid because he
implied that the new creation still lied
that all of the power of the blood of Jesus could not
stop a new creation man from lying

I almost asked if he knew the Jesus he was talking about
or he had created another one for his vocation

whatever
i don't hate men
i just don't approve of men who have not
discovered their purpose in God

Peace!

Mtschew!!!

Why do ministers think they have to have spic and span past?

It is sick. Why would people lie on and on? Are they silly or what? God loves me, no matter whether i am spic and span or not, His word makes me clean.

I have heard so many lies this afternoon, i doubt the Holy Spirit will be able to work with lies. All that God asks for is that the gospel is preached. I don't see anywhere where he asks Peter or John or Phillip to lie and whitewash their stories by themself.

I am a sweetheart that does not take any bullshit, if i want to give anyone advice, the first thing that will be coming out of my mouth will not be lies. By the way whatever foundation is built on lies will not stand.

Why do people prefer public opinion to what God thinks?

I was talking with a friend and she says that a girl who got pregnant as a teenager would not be willing to keep her pregnancy if it happened today? i promptly told her that the girl who kept that pregnancy is a better christian than the one who would abort because of shame. By the way God's opinion matters more and anything done because of public opinion just proved that religion had gained the upper hand in the life of the individual and that relationship had gone out of the window.

I can tell you categorically that any person like that is living empty and on the verge of a breakdown? what really is christianity?

Holy Spirit, keep me straight.
let pleasing any man not be more important than me pleasing you
Help me put God first

God doesn't heal you because you are walking right or your good works
More than His healing, a relationship with Him matter more
By the way, the confidence of His love for you gives you confidence and
no one will ever be able to threaten you because you know Who owns you

Selah

Ministers and their desire to lie: as if it makes them more righteous than the one purchased for them with the blood of Jesus, that is just the height of insecurity, i don't care what anyone thinks of me, He has made me righteous, i don't need any human's approval to make me feel better and i don't need to prove anything to anyone.

random

I wish i had some negative emotion to share
just to watch my blogger page come alive and people scrambling
to advice me, but unfortunately, the negative emotions are gone.

The hurt, the anger, the pride, the fear, they are all gone
In its place is courage and faith.
In their place is the prophecies he sent me long before time.

"Young Lady, have faith in God"

I will have faith, because the Most High God
the creator of the heavens and the earth cared about me
enough to send me word.

My garden, my heart is fine
the sand, the stone, the rocks are gone
My heart is soft to the word of God and the Spirit of God again

I just know that God knows and understands
more than that, He knows what He is doing
I am so sure of the things that He has told me

I have learnt to move beyond the physical mediators on earth
God did not appoint anyone anyways, even Jesus carried our confessions
Jesus does not say to ask Him for anything, He says we should ask the
Father in His name, that wonderful name

Just basking in the love of God

My babushka, my praying grandmother has gone to be with God
I promised myself i wouldn't have any regrets but i already have one
I regret not spending enough time with her and not being caring enough
I never knew she was dying, i had no idea and that hurt me so much

My solace is that she is with God and that i will see her when i go to meet Jesus
some sixty something years from now
She lived till 95 but i thought she would be like her mom
who lived till 120. It was not to be, my grandma had only one child
but she affected so many and they said, we must all wait for them to gather
from around the world to come and honour her.

You know: everyday i make my own plans, but God has His way with me
I have learned that in my life, God is the welcome interrupter
so no matter how many plans i make, i know He'll butt in to direct me
on to the right path.

that's it

Good news: i am writing like a locomotive
coined from my childhood phrase: "smoking like a locomotive"

Laters

Content

I am just content

Yes, they are still talking
Yes, they still show their hatred
but it is not for the reasons they campaigned about
It is just pure ambition
Ugly religion
They admit their faults but carry as usual.

Not intimidated
Not anymore
I have lost all the illusions i had about them
Was worried about my faith
But it is that much stronger for the storm it
has walked through

I have come through smelling good
wiser, smarter,
was cynical
but guess what?

My enthusiasm is back and now anytime
they come at me
I just rise higher

Knowing that God has His hand on me does give me
more confidence

Totally nuts...

All i know for sure is that they are 'nuts'
Today was a lil' day in their meddlings for them

Then in the middle of their story
She warns him to be careful that she is the new mrs B
I don't understand, was he married before?

yeah, i said it
They are absolutely sick
She gave the game away
Of course, instead of him to preach and let God
do the speaking
He planned a little speech about some information
he wants to get across and uses the devotion
as his little tool for transferring info to me

I wish he would just have the guts to speak to me directly
She is a pawn, who cares about her
I hope she enjoys her struggles, i can honestly
say i am glad i am not in your position
Not that i expect that to make her secure
her biggest problem has always been insecurity

What is that saying about money and marriage?
It magnifies what was already there before
Good luck getting on with your life...
Just don't make it about me, i am done with your games
and all the rubbish you want to spend the rest of your life doing
leave me out of your mess, you got in yourself
deal with it.

Meanwhile, i am walking by faith with a vengeance
no apologies to anyone
I don't play politics, will never play it
For me, it silences the Holy Ghost
And without Him, i can't see tomorrow

My pastors (the both of them) told me to keep silent
After this rant, no more talking and showing off
I didn't do anything special to make the Holy Spirit
take an interest in me, other than depending on Him

Nuff said!

I wanted to delete the previous post
I have forgotten but i thought it was an offloading of how i was feeling then
I want it recorded
You can't change others
But you can change yourself.

I have decided to walk in love
So just before July begins, i am deciding to walk in joy
and in faith and in love
They are spiritual fruits that should manifest because i have
the Holy Spirit and i have decided to use every opportunity
to grow in these two fruits
God would be well pleased and i would have improved my lot

Yes you guessed it
I have fasting so this wicked flesh is not quite as in control
as it used to be
My spirit is rising up...

Gone before i have really put up anything, yeah
I need a filter so that i don't reveal everything about me
So i can't write too much
I can only whet your appetite a lil'

One thing for sure
I am working on my r/ship with God!

@hartramsey picked on me

I have it in for @hartramsey…

The guy claims to be a pastor, I don’t how true that is but being a pastor is no excuse for lying and thinking you are God. He has got to change his attitude problem, your sheep are in church, not every believer is your sheep and we are not under any obligation to agree with your personal opinion. I believe the word of God, but I sure as heck will not believe that God anointed you so you can go about calling women hoes.

He made a big mistake when he decided to up and call me hoe for no reason other than the fact that I asked that he be decent and mature enough to correct people with the word of God instead of opinion, all that kept coming out of his mouth were insult.

My old friend once told me that the greatest men were the ones who had mastered humility, well @hartramsey has none. Anyone that dares to disagree with his opinion gets blocked and insulted. The insults I will not tolerate. No patience whatsoever, I wonder if he’s ever read Gal 5:22 and if he knows that the believer is not called to obey just the scripture that pleases him but all of God’s love.

He preaches grace but in his attitude and character, he does not know or understand the meaning of that word, I wonder how the women in church cope with his insulting bullying habit. Then he had the temerity to say that I was after the number of followers he had on twitter. That is such neurotic behaviour because if the members of his church are as unloving as him then I am not missing much.

His church may be a business but I am doubly sure that it is not a place of transformation. He’s going to regret insulting me all because of his business of twitter because if you are defending God (and we are not called to defend God) you would not have to insult anyone to accomplish that.

I had the misfortune of trying to explain to his sister @jenellethemodel about her brother’s uncouth behaviour and lack of courtesy towards any kind of woman and she refused to get it. He ought to wash his mouth out with soap any time he insults women maybe that would teach him to bridle his tongue.

“LOL! She is so blocked and forgotten. Lol! Thank God He remembers her b/c I don’t”

I do remember you nigga because your speech talk less of actions are always demeaning and degrading. Who gives you the right to insult a woman you do not know in exactly the same way you insult the women in church in the name of preaching Jesus to them. I know his business (church) is running just fine, next time I ask him the meaning of preaching and thirsty, he should just answer instead of insulting many women in the name of correcting a particular person if that is the way to correct someone you supposedly love. His congregation are in trouble, big one!

“She came after me so she can put me on blast to my FEW followers. No loss”

“She came after me with another account”

So to him, it’s a profit and loss statement, he does not realize that he’s dealing with human beings, I for one. God made him a steward and he protects his stewardship by lying on unsuspecting women who ask what he means by insulting women and calling them preachy and thirsty…he can’t explain and so he says I support women hoeing around. In another life, women must have dealt him hard blows because I know it is not my encounter that causes him to hate women always enough to be constantly insulting them.

What I don’t get is how he gets off thinking he has the right to call any woman hoe, who does he think he is?

“Some Nigerian chick counselling me that single sisters who hoe around are just going thru a phase & shouldn’t be admonished”

Now here is what I said:

Here is how it started:

@ctdaviswife: Single ladies its not good to be preachy and thirsty @hartramsey #WifeLife Lol I didn’t get many amens on that 1.

Next

@hartramsey I’m married and it blessed me. Most preachy people are sad, broke and lonely #The deepshallow

Seeing as a married responded to a single quote, I did busy body and responded and said he should use the word of God to address issues instead of the insults he’s used to from the ghetto. He has a loose tongue that insults more than it builds.

I almost regretted having the convo with @hartramsey but I don’t, it helped me understand the kind of person he is and I have unblocked the nigga. I briefly thought about insulting him and calling him dog and dog associations, gigolo, thief and many other names on his twitter page in a bid to be just as immature as he was but I decided it would not be worth it. My suggestion is that he stop calling women hoes and using the word as a weapon against believers.

In the words of the eight year old me, he should go and pick on someone his own size, since we are kids and whatnots in his presence, he should try picking on the devil…

I have broken through
people make all sort of jokes
But i did break through.

What do i value most about myself?
My sincerity
but my ability to keep haters at a distance

God is good
Spending time with God is just awesome
I am glad He didn't say: You have been away so long
I have forgotten you
God is a good friend...

No judgments
No pressure
No stress

He makes things easy
and He's real
No robotics

Just being me with God
and knowing that He is for me for real is bam!
Who uses those words any

I miss my 'tisha' blog,
tis why i came here
I try to write in my new blog
but its not as good as this

I see through everyone now to the TRUTH

The biggest truth i see is that God is still here with me
I made all the right decisions
Even though it was as though i was in the dark

God says, no matter how clear we see, it is through a thick glass
that after a while we will see clear
So i am still walking with Him

My greatest victory!

Lord, what do i do with all this dirt?

Why are people always throwing dirt at me. Well, a seed can't grow if it's not covered in dirt. Much dirt much harvest. 

I have been complaining lately about this. People hear news, forgive me, i mean gossip about me and forget what the gospel says, why is that?
You cannot impact someone you hate or resent neither can you see any good about them, all that you will see is gloom and doom. What does the gospel of Jesus Christ have to do with gloom and doom?


These judges, self appointed and pharisees, they tick me off, how did i ever cope before now? Why do they feel the need to compete with me or gossip about me with the intention to run me down and think they do God a favour? Did God ask them for a favour? 
I don't need their help because they have no answers and all they do is yack, yack yack at me and at the end of the day, nothing has changed but they have exercised their mouths again. They want to offer pity, i don't need it, are you deaf? I don't want your pity!


I am not supposed to defend myself rights abi. So i am supposed to ignore them, and when i do they get pissed, they expect me to confide in them so this time they should have confirmed yacking, o sorry no, righteous yacking, approved by the lord. I don't understand why they can't see it. Or why they won't. They want to help, uh nope, they care how things look on the outside without taking heed to their inside, its all about what everyone think, tis matters even more than what God thinks. Let me try to understand why: you know we can't see God but we can see ourselves so let's focus on making everything look good even if it aint, let's pretend!
No i don't think so, i will not be pretending along with you, do your thang, just don't drag me along with you on the pretend game.


I think it'd be easy for them to realize that not everyone likes to be fake, some people would like genuine faith and genuine smiles. Like me for example, i don't want to be transparent and smile genuinely at you and then hear all the nasty things you say behind me, it doesn't make for comfortable conversation and trust. If you have talked about me behind my back, never expect me to be vulnerable with you because all i am giving you is content for news to be discussed on Sunday, wednesdays and maybe other times we need to discuss God's dirty linen and how we get rid of it (religious mind at work again) and of course opposition and persecution to get the people in line with what God says, what happened to grace? 
Of course some persecution are Jesus approved, Jesus loves gossip and backbiting... (I just want to see somewhere in the gospel of Jesus Christ where this is approved)
Why would you want to know something you have no solution for, or something you think the blood of Jesus is defenseless against? Get real, focus on the things you can deal with, things you can't deal with, let it be!
Stop the picking and the prodding, stop attacking my dreams, face yours!


Pissed!

The truth about moi

The truth about me
The ugly truth about me is:
That although i clean up good and am well brought up
Without God, i'm simply UGLY
Not externally but inside
I am pretty much as frail as other humans like me

The difference when i'm really admirable
is that i let the Holy Ghost shine through

and when i don't
there you have it again
UGLY

What am i saying?
He makes me beautiful
But that is not why i love Him
I love Him because His grace saved me
made me worthwhile
Made me able to give grace also
and to have the patience to see beauty
in others when God gains His position as Lord in their hearts

Grace
makes the difference for me

Correction: People don't give Christianity a bad name
that is legalism and religion speaking...
Christianity could never have a bad name, all you have to do
is remember the CROSS, nothing is as awesome as the cross

Guess what?
I don't feel condemned by you because my justification does not come by you
I feel sorry for you being so ignorant as to think that anything in you could
justify you.
Only GRACE does it!

Grace vs Law
I'd still choose grace
Difference is i learnt to give others grace, i started by giving rapists grace
If you have read all of my blog, you must have known how difficult that was
But it helped give me the heart that everyone finds so beautiful now
I had to learn to forgive to even access the heart of God...

Be ravenous to learn about God, it's the only way, stop being a smart ass
He can't work with already filled heads

By the way, i'm dropping the bad habits i picked from you of judging people
and trying to save them in my own strength
You should have figured out by now that it doesn't work, it only produces
hard hearts, only soft hearts can receive the word of God.

I love you for real!

I would never have known anything about love
Had i not met Him
Of course i had met other 'hims'
they always had their expectations
but from Him i had acceptance

If i can't shout about redemption
adoption
son-ship
inheritance
i can shout about His presence

He is a supernatural God o
me i no fit shout
My Abba
I love you
Had i never found You
My life would have been empty

Everyone has their definitions of love
Me, i believe you are love
All the attributes of love can only be done
when i put you first
If not face it"s impossible, loving others the way you do
that is

But then that is what is special about love
its supernatural
i think imma let it all go
tired of living as less than i could be

Love is in me
thus i love like You
I'll love like You
and when i fall short of Your standards
I'll depend on your grace to try it again

cos like it or not
there is no going back
I'm following Christ
I'm following You
so i want to love like You do

Happy Valentines day

As some brother used to always say

"I love you with the love of God"

I am excited about 2012

God, you are it
I am letting it all out

Supernatural, help me remember Holy Spirit...

I refuse to operate in the natural when there is supernatural

I wait on God
I hate being followed
I am not God, just a servant of the most high
I am God; but not God in His supremacy

I still take my calls from God
even though i am being blocked
God is at work in me in spite of the adversity
and controversies and heresies and jealousies

I just want to be above it all
It's just delay
I want to be absolutely Kingdom minded
That is the only way God can use me in any way
I just want it all fast, fast so i can get on with my life
Because i don't think this is the life God has for me

So much struggles and a true believer doesn't struggle
or wrought his miracles with his will power

Lord i submit to you
in words and actions and purpose...

You are working good for me and mine
Thank you Jesus

No matter what it looks like, compare the picture in your mind, to what you are currently seeing, and know that it gets better. You can transition from "now" to better, through prayer, preparation, perseverance, and positive written reminders, hence "Write the vision, and make it plain on tablets, so they that see it, can run with it," Habakkuk 2:2.  

Prophetess Teracarissa

baring my heart I

You know i honestly get tired of blogging this stuff
but i just need to offload some...

My environment tried to take me and shape me and make me
and many times i thot and felt that it had succeeded
I thought she had died, the one who lived to hope
But i discover today that she is not dead, i found out that
she's alive and stronger today than before she went into the fire
She certainly has stronger principles and a greater understanding of people
stronger values and a deep sense of what love really is
She understands God more and His plans and purposes
She loves better today than yesterday, she has a greater sense of right & wrong
and in spite of the darkness in the world; so dark you really have no idea

Through it all,
She has chosen to shine, come rain or sunshine
she is going to shine not like the stars but like the sun

Scriptures say that 'as He is in heaven, so are we on earth'

The new chic is convinced beyond the whims and caprices of man,
God does rule, He works everything according to the counsel of His will

Aside:
I thank God i did not let the 'cynic' grow inside me. God loves me so much
he kept my heart strong enough and soft enough for growth.

I refuse to operate in the natural when there is a supernatural.

cont'd tomorrow!

Getting to know 'Tisha'

Getting to know you Blogfest

1. Name two [romantic suspense] authors who inspire you.

Francine Rivers: 

She is awesome and also Christian so you don't have to worry that it is directing your heart towards loving a rake. I have read all her books excepting the most recent "Her Daughter's Dream"

Ted Dekker:

He helps me understand romance from a guy's point of view, most times they only do it just to please women.

2. How did you start writing in your genre?

I have been writing since i was eleven.

3. You've landed a meeting with your dream agent. Write a one paragraph pitch to sell your novel to him/her.

She walks with a perfect gait, she is a black haired young woman with dreams and determination to achieve her dreams. Like all good things, it hasn't come easy but she is not going to give up on her dreams, she walks to her office building with enthusiasm and confidence.

4. Sabotage or accident- which would put your female lead through and why?

Sabotage, it happens ever so often and almost everyone has gone through one betrayal or another from close friends.

5. Plotter or Pantser? Who are you?

I don't know who a pantser is. I think i am a plotter, i get a story and i start writing and as i write, the story starts changing and getting more interesting with the twists and turns. I plot a story but i give the novel the freedom to go where it wants.

____________

This Blogfest is a carryover from the Platform Building Campaign and was organised by JL Campbell of the Character Depot

Building...

Faith starts with knowing God loves you.

From the time i was a little child i used to sing this song:

He loves me, i cannot say why) 2ce

On Calvary's tree, he suffered for me

He loves me, i cannot say why.

Until i had a reason to doubt His love i wasn't so sure, i never did talk about many of the fellowships i went to who preached condemnation and every time after they had preached i would say, Jesus definitely doesn't love me, i am no longer perfect. Even in my beloved fellowship at times when my 'gist' would get around, some of the pastors would preach condemnation but my head pastor stuck to the truth in spite of how he might have wanted to join the crowd and i got my teenage bible where i was like the Berean (always cross checking), soon i was a bible scholar knowing what God was saying to me. So He loves me and i could never doubt it.

Scripture says 'Believe and you will see'

Don't trust in what your eyes can see, trust in what God reveals to you in your spirit as you spend time with him enough to hear. I have had the opportunity to believe before i see several times but my real name means favor and so i just happen to believe that God always reserves the best for me. He is a perfect God and His mercy is towards me always. He fixes that matches i fight so i am constantly sure of victory even though i am not physically super strong but the Holy Ghost is constantly waiting to help me, my hero, my super man.

I love to worship. When i worship, i seem so invincible, at that very moment i believe that i can do anything and i am not afraid of nothing, His presence makes me strong. I know how to surrender and give Him everything. I have been criticized for worshiping severally, told i wasn't good enough or perfect enough to worship but no one can stop me from doing something from which i get strength.

The God who loves me, His word is infallible, i believe it! Yep i said it. I believe the word of God. I am grateful for His love. His word is my energizer and quickener, i love God. Yes, it is because He loved me first but heck i didn't even know love before i met Him.

Another lesson is that all things are created by thought.

I choose to discipline my thoughts and cast down every wrong thinking pattern by the help of His word, my latest goal is to renew my mind. I have been praying, thank God for grace. I feel like i have been in a desert and just come out to an oasis (The spirit of God & the word of God)

Moammar Gaddafi is dead!

@washingtonpost: VIDEO: Moammar Gaddafi shown reportedly killed in Sirte Rhttp://wapo.st/oh54d0

It's sad abi i have to retort to this to get some attention. I am not sad to say that I am happy this man who has caused so much sadness for people in Libya is dead. It sounds almost as good as when i discovered at midnight on twitter that Osama Bin Laden was dead. 

I have missed all my tweet family and when i went to ex sch nerd's site i discovered why, they are hopping from blogger to twitter to google plus.

Olufunke is back and she wrote something on how she is thankful and then listed so many things i don't identify with so much. Not so much that it isn't true, it is just difficult for me to rejoice because things are not going so well.

I am thankful because His love for me is unending. I am thankful because He has good plans for me even though i may not see them yet but they are true. I am thankful that He has a good life planned for me, that He takes care of my family that He knows tomorrow and that i am connected to Him *I think this is a great way to be thankful*. I am sorry about all the people that did not make it but i will not be one of them, i am a conqueror because He lives in me.

Myne does not comment here any longer and maybe it is because i am not nice but i am not in the mood to be nice to anyone, i am in a blunt mood, i tell it as it is! She does have a new interesting novel she is writing about, i love true romance for anyone that is interested, you can click above.

I have been bugging my dad, what is my best phrase? 

"What can a man give in exchange for his soul?"

as much as he has done wrong (so much) i wish he could really commit to God and i pray to God for him that He would divinely encounter God and it seems so impossible but i am unimaginably favoured to be serving a God who doesn't want situations that seem like He can deal with them, He's not intimidated so He can deal with them and take care of my family too.

 PS

I think i am done picking on folks 

You  can check it at the link above...

I still live

*I thing the blogfam have given up on me, no comments on three posts


Unrepentant:
Showing no regret for one's wrongdoings
The lady from yesterday, yeah, i am sure you guessed that she is unrepentant, people are saying i should have pushed her back. Instead she told me she wasn't my mate; yes, she isn't, she's my colleague whether she likes it or not and she has no right to be rude to me, and i will teach her so.


I am writing the imagery of what is going on
my chest is constricted, i can't breathe
I feel like a vise is tightening my neck,constricting me, my essence
As i walk, i see all eyes  no many eyes full of hatred
open hatred, deep hatred
I go somewhere to a room and i am pushed, twice!
disdained openly, disrespected and embarassed
The environment is so threatening
 I wonder how i got here and why
everything is so tough seems so tough
The words on the inside of the walls
speak of hope, restoration, but barely outside the walls
all i hear is mocking laughter, the struggle for survival
the harsh terrain of the world system, shocking contradictions
I feel calm on the inside
everyday the waves of hostility
try their darndest to shatter my fortress of calm
and i am tempted to break my fortress
and walk in the flesh and in what i see with my human eyes
judgment, their own personal opinions of how everything MUST go


But i refuse to be bogged down
I refuse to come down to the fleshly, earthly, sensual, carnal, slave to my senses level
I am a slave to righteousness, dead!
I am dead to the emotions, whims and caprices of man, even mine
My face is set in one direction only
I am unmoved by the very loud voices of unspoken words
God is working, i am convinced He's bringing me GOOD
Even when mouths are forced to remain closed
the eyes still speak but i look beyond them to the countenance of my God, He is the creator
skilled in creating GOOD circumstances as i keep SPEAKING what He has said


As He is, so am i in this world and so in spite of what i see, i speak forth into the spiritual realm,
a new beginning for me and my family, we are expectant not just of new lives; we are expectant
that towards us as we believe, God is bringing us GOODNESS beyond our imagination


Even as i am aware that my name is in the mouth of many and thus in their homes
been smeared and another attempt to take me down, i smile into the eyes of the enemy
(Yes i am not unaware of the devices of the enemy)
I smile and say into the eyes of the enemy "In case you forgot, i told you i am a winner, more
than a conqueror, an overcomer in this life" 
Lol, a loud conquering laughter, Yes i can
You're gonna have to do more than that to take me down
and even then you won't succeed. I am marching forward, I can't be defeated
have you forgotten that He lives in me?
I haven't! The One who raised Jesus from the dead, He lives in me
Do you think He's just lying fallow, He's working in me, He's working in my family
He's doing the unimaginable, the incredible, He's energizing me and my family daily
He's doing wonders in me and in my family and i will yet see the marvels of God all the days of my life
I and my family will live a long and satisfying life (God's mind, man just learns from experience)
So i'm ditching my own mind and using the mind of Christ.


Later!


NB It's awesome to be a Christian, I am grateful to be connected to Christ. My imagination cannot be reined in, it runs, flies and soars free. I love this, it's not motivation, no not at all! It's divine inspiration, it's because He lives in me. He's not fallow or barren; He's alive and working in me.


State of mind: I wanna dance, let go, run free!